I Do Intermittent Fasting Because Of Brain Health And Also Because I Want Attention

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What is intermittent fasting? Idk you can Google it. But it’s this thing I’ve been doing lately.

Here’s the TLDR on IF:

  • “Breakfast is the most important meal of the day” was a lie literally fed to us by the cereal industry. EVERYTHING YOU KNOW IS A LIE.
  • Eating window: 8 hours. Play window (aka fasting window!): 16 hours.
  • It’s all about the cells. Your body goes through autophagy when it’s not digesting your cheetos. Autophagy is like cells recycling themselves and is said to make you smarter, younger, skinnier, ETC! It’s probably all a scam, biology is probably a scam, but anything to make me smarter ya kno!
  • Most people have been fasting 16 hours their whole lives without knowing it, most people are skinny without knowing it
  • Beyonce has been rumored to IF, what else do you want from me. Also Miranda Kerr, Nicole Kidman, and J-Lo.
  • J-Lo literally hasn’t aged in 3 decades so don’t tell me it’s a scam.

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My overall thoughts

I’ve been IF-ing since March, generally only on week days. I don’t really “try” on weekends, although I think most the time I don’t eat until noon or later, and rarely eat after 9:00 PM anyway. But like if brunch is at 10:30 AM then let there be brunch. And I definitely don’t IF while traveling, AKA 75% of 2019 for me.

It was hard waiting to eat until noon at first, and it really depends on how big dinner was the night before. BUT THEN IT WAS VERY EASY. Then I pushed until 1:00 PM because it was more convenient for me to work out at lunch then eat afterwards if I wanted to — also because it can be hard to be done eating by 8:00 PM, okay, a 1:00 – 9:00 PM window is more comfy.

I honestly go back and forth between 12-8 and 1-9 just depending on my ~mood~ and when I get hungry. There are apps that let you actually time your 16 hour window, but fam, I flat out do not care if it’s not exactly 16 hours, and I do not need another health tracking app.

Have I lost weight???? No, please calm down. But I’m honestly eating whatever I want in my window. Like donuts will be brought to the office, and I will wait to eat one until  the afternoon because I’m mature.

A lot of articles say most people only lose weight because you automatically eat less in a shorter window, AND I DON’T DOUBT THAT, however I have no issues fitting all my foods in!:::))))))))::))):):):):)

HOWEVER.

I will say it’s shocking how much I get away with in an 8-hour window. Like murder, but also how reckless I can be with diet, and not gain 500 pounds. I know you know that I know that you know I eat healthy, I really do, but I also eat whatever I want, ya know. I feel like sticking to IF consistently has helped me to literally travel eat pure lard and still fit in my jeans.

Wow is anyone still reading! Are u bort! I love talking about what I eat almost as much as I love reading about what others eat!!!!!

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A Day Of Intermittent Fasting

8:00 AM
Black coffee! For the first time ever, I’m drinking and enjoying black coffee. Creamer is literally too sweet for me now. I’m like very tough! You don’t even know! Arm wrestle me!

12:00 PM
About once a week, I’ll do a lunch work out at noon. In my ultimate dream goals, I accomplish work outs early in the morning, but in real life I have a gym at my office, a flexible work schedule, and no desire to wake up early. It’s surprisingly not hard to work out on an empty stomach at noon???? I am the bionic man???? But I’m always ready to eat at 1p.

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1:00 PM
Avocado toast is my favorite invention, and I eat it every day at 1pm. I used to be skinny and put half an avocado on 1 slice, but I’ve decided big gul gotta eat and now I am a two-slice girl.

I add lemon juice and Everything But The Bagel seasoning. I always have something on the side like carrots and hummus. I eat so much hummus in a week, it should be alarming. My body is 70% water and 30% hummus.

3:00 PM
This is about the time when I eat whatever is around me o’clock. That is typically a donut. Or yogurt pretzels. If I’m extra meal prepped that week, I’ll have homemade chiaseed pudding with me. This is just 2 tbsp chia seeds in a mason jar filled with milk and a stevia packet. WOW THAT STEVIA PACKET IS KEY, NEVER FORGET IT. I like to throw in blackberries or a crushed up Nature Valley bar.

Or honestly just more veggies and hummus because I can never have too much hummus!!!!!!

7:00 PM
I always come home and start dinner as fast as physically possible, so we’re usually eating by 7ish.

Here are our favorite meals on rotation. You should know that I’m equal parts health freak and lazy person, so any recipe I make on rotation has to be very like “throw it together while blindfolded” on the levels of basic to advanced cooking.

  1. Baked veggies. We literally choose any three veggies–Cauliflower, purple onion, broccoli, beets, sweet potato–and throw them in the oven. Throw olive oil, salt, pepper, and garlic on it. We’ll pair it with chicken, or quinoa, cooked chickpeas, or just throw it over a bed of lettuce. Maybe some hot sauce. I will put hot sauce on anything. Does this sound gross? I get that. But actually it’s SO GOOD and you’re wrong and I’m right and I’ll never change.
  2. Cauliflower pasta. Chop up cauliflower in tiny pieces, bake it, throw it in a stir fry pan with ground turkey meat and pasta sauce, sprinkle parm on top. I got this recipe and the one below from Style Scribe, here. We eat this almost every week.
  3. Ice berg tacos. You can make this one with ground turkey meat, but I am a firm believer that these tacos must be made with the real stuff. Cook up ground beef with taco seasoning, throw inside ice berg shells.
  4. Chicken dill salad. I recently discovered this recipe and I’m addicted. ADDICTED. It’s just throwing all ingredients in one bowl, no cook, no prep, eat immediately, left overs for days!
  5. One pot primavera. Another recent discovery. We almost never eat pasta, so this is random for us, but the lentil pasta mixed with veggies makes it basically a salad.
  6. Tabouleh. A staple!!!!!! If I’m really on my A GAME, this is meal prepped on Sunday. This recipe is my favorite.

I really love food and exercises and diets and issues surrounding all of the above so I’m always prepared and ready to taco bout it.

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