The True Story Of Being A 25-Year-Old And Sitting At A Beyonce Concert Alone

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pic via beyonce.com jk i snapchatted it

I went to a Beyonce concert alone. This is my story.

February 16, 2016: The day I decided I’m capable of going to a Beyonce concert alone.
I asked everyone I knew if they would go to the concert with me. A few said yes, but there were disagreements about how much to spend on tickets, where to sit, and when to buy the tickets. No one else wanted to spend a lot, sit close, and buy immediately. It was v hard for me.

So with no support but my own ignorant free will, I bought a seat ticket on the floor, with the hopes that at least one other friend would end up going, so I could at least have someone to ride with.

WEEKS FOLLOWED. STILL NONE OF MY FRIENDS HAD BOUGHT TICKETS.

March 8, 2016, 9:41pm: My mom found out.

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April 27th, 7:57 p.m.

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My friends consumed 1 margarita, 1 time, and immediately bought Yonce tickets on their phones. like wut????? it was that easy?????? Yes, it was a Wednesday, and it was literally that easy.

BUT FINALLY, I HAD PEOPLE TO AT LEAST RIDE WITH.

May 9th, 2016

9:57am: I listened to Beyonce on Tidal the whole day at work. I really didn’t get into the Beyonce we know and love today until her self-titled album, so sitting through the album “4” was a unique experience. #notherbest #wowowowowselftitledtho

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5:01pm: I drove home. I changed into my IVY park leggings and hat, and DON’T WORRY BE YONCE shirt, because I’m a millennial and I have to look the part.

6:00pm: My friends and I left exactly on time, which is a miracle in and of itself. None of us wanted to drive, myself especially, so Paige Meredith Skinner volunteered, because she is the Lord’s servant doing the Lord’s work.

6:55pm: We parked at J.Gilligans. Traffic is real. I was expecting J.Gilligans to be grossly crowded. Like I was legit concerned we weren’t going to be seated to eat. When we walked in, there were a few obvious concert-goers, but the place was largely empty.

I proceed to order a bowl of chips and queso, a turkey club sandwich with fries, two beers, and two shots. Lemonade shots. Because Lemonade. Because Beyonce. Because doing this right.

The concert start time was 7, but we had no real intentions of being on time for DJ Kahled because be serious.

7:47pm: Panic. Fear.

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8:05pm: We were given wristbands then shuttled from J’s to Jerry World. Don’t ask me why J.Gilligans gives out wristbands for the shuttle ride, but take note, because we come back to this in a minute.

8:22pm: The weather was gr8. There were no lines to get in.

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8:23pm: BUT THERE WERE LINES EVERY WHERE ELSE. My friends went to their seats, and I was left alone at the bar. I risked everything I’ve ever lived for and waited in line for a Chardonnay, so I could be drinking Chard while Bey sang about it. The dream.

Looking back on this, I should have just gone to my seating area, because the floorseaters have their own bathrooms and bars. I didn’t know. Because I’ve never sat on the floorseats. I’ve also never flown first class. Does anyone feel sorry for me yet. I only created this blog for sympathy.

9:01pm: After waiting almost 40 minutes in line, getting my two Miller Lites (OUT OF EVERY WINE BEFORE 9, IT’S A SIN) on the first floor bar like a common peasant, I hauled it to my seat.

The floor area is kind of bizarre. I just walked downstairs. It was semi a free for all. I asked a security guard if they needed to see my ticket and she said, “No, I can see your wristband.” This was a J.Gilligans bus wristband, not a floorseat wristband. So I said, “ok,” and walked to my seat.

But I didn’t walk to my seat.

I walked to an open seat closer to the stage because apparently I want someone to actually beat me up at a Beyonce concert. I was able to sit there the whole time and my only regret is not being even more obnoxious and not trying to sit even closer.

9:13pm:

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9:18pm: I had to pee so bad I could have died. But if I missed Beyonce starting the concert, then I would have actually died. I finally decided to risk my life and go, running to and from the bathroom with a beer in each hand and a wallet in my bra.

I made it.

I’m not saying I’m a hero but.

9:21pm:

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hi

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for bey

9:30pm: Beyonce finally went on stage, opening up with Formation, and I’m so sorry if you follow me on snapchat and had to listen to me screamlikeimbeingmurdered/sing.

9:30 – 11:30pm: It was awesome. It was everything you want a Beyonce concert to be. I had the time of my life and stood up literally the whole time and did not blink once. For whatever reason, the jumbotron wasn’t on. Which is super annoying for the 99% of the Jones audience that can’t see anything.

I was disappointed and shocked and confused and stunned that she didn’t play more from Lemonade??? The concert was basically a montage of Beyonce’s life, and that didn’t include a ton of Lemonade, so it’s fine, I was wanting to see “Pray You Catch Me” live, but itsfineimfine.com.

She DID however play my least favorite song from Lemonade, “All Night” which, spoiler alert, Beyonce said was her FAVORITE song from the album, itsfineimfine.com.

There were fireworks, arial hammocks, a prince tribute, thankful words, a Texas flag, home videos of child and teen Yonce, videos of adult Yonce smashing things, a female guitarist in ripped white jeans, hundreds of leotards, and water and splashing. I think my favorite part was at the end, the whole dance routine and performance to “Freedom” on the splash-able water stage.

Her hair was wet. It was powerful.

11:38pm: The concert ended and  I texted my friends with only 1% battery left and somehow found them, I’ll literally never know how, then we waited for the shuttle for what may  have been 5 and 1/2 years, then finally got back to our car, where we listened to Taylor Swift on the way home. #tayafterbey

1:23am: I literally didn’t get home until this exact time, according to text history. A seven hour ordeal. Worth it.

im so glad i did it and i dont regret anything no ragrats

i semi modeled this post after this buzzfeed article that is a million times funnier so please dont read it. 

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