2 < 2
They say every pregnancy is different. They also say your second baby usually comes earlier than the first. I found one of those things to be true for me. Being pregnant with Caswell was totally different than being pregnant with Ruby. I was much sicker in Caswell’s first trimester, had more headaches, nausea. Then there’s the whole taking care of a toddler dynamic. Just a whole new world of difference from the first pregnancy experience.
FINDING OUT THE GENDER
We did not find out the gender with Ruby, but we did with Caswell. After going through both experiences, I have to say, there is nothing like a gender surprise delivery. If we have a third, we definitely want to do a surprise. Lane LOVES surprises. I joke that Lane would prefer I surprise him with news I’m pregnant the day I give birth. SURPRISE, DADDY.
INDUCTION VS SPONTANEOUS DELIVERY
For context, I had the same doctor and hospital for both Cas & Ruby.
My doc encouraged me to schedule an induction since Caswell’s due date was 1/1/22 and it would make life a little easier to know when baby was coming during the holidays. HOWEVER I LIKE LIFE TO BE AS COMPLICATED AND CHAOTIC AS POSSIBLE so I really had no interest in an induction.
We went ahead and scheduled one at 39 weeks pregnant, and the only reason I did it was because I was convinced–CONVINCED–I would not make it to 39 weeks. Ruby came 2 weeks early and I just knew I would deliver 2-3 weeks early with Caswell. (My team at work was literally fully trained and onboarded to take over a full month before I actually delivered, by early December. I awkwardly finished out the year with them lol and very nearly could have seen them in the new year after Christmas break lol ROFL GOD LAFFS AT UR PLANZ.)
And so I did make it to week 39 lol.
The day before I was supposed to go in for my 39-week induction, I called and canceled hehe. I am the sappy sap sap who wants BaBy tO PiCk ThEiR OwN BiRtHdAy.
unless that birthday is too long after due date 🙂
So we scheduled a second induction for Monday January 3, 2022, two days after my due date. But again, I ~knew~ I wouldn’t make it that far.
I just knew I would give birth in a manger and have a baby by Christmas.
I just knew I would be kissing a newborn at midnight on new year’s eve.
Both came and went.
By my due date, I had eaten every date in North Dallas, drank enough red raspberry leaf tea to drown China, and curb walked my entire neighborhood multiple times. Still no bebe.
So I WOKE UP MONDAY MERNIN READY 2 GO.
Let me tell ya fam, nothing like a scheduled induction. It’s basically the same as checking into a day spa. I had my hair and make up done. I was freshly showered and rested. I was perfectly packed. We waltzed into the hospital, la tee dah. We took a selfie at home before heading to the hospital. La la la. So zen. Much peace.
Going into labor with Ruby was about as peaceful as evacuating town to avoid a tsumani.
GETTING THE EPIDURAL
We arrived at 7:00 AM and began the process. I had coasted at 3 cm dilated and 80% effaced for several weeks, so I didn’t have to come the night before to “ripen the cervix”. After epidural and pitocin, there was no knowing how long it would take for me to fully dilate. Baby could come that day super quick, or the next day.
First things first was shooting me up with that epidural. I was nervous for this because I had a horrible epidural experience with Ruby. With her, the shot was excruciatingly painful and I vommitted exactly four times afterwards, in addition to normal side effects like shaking.
This second time around, I told my nurses what had happened and how nervous I was and they were like, “Oh that’s because you have naturally low blood pressure. If it dips too low, you’re more likely to get sick. We just won’t let it get low.” I was like okay????? sounds good??????? whydidntthenursesdothatlasttime???? it’s fine tho i’m fine tho
So the epidural guys came in and gave me my shot, which for some reason was not nearly as painful as it was with Ruby. I told them this. They said they used a numbing cream “and were just smarter than the last guy” lol. but it does make u wonder.
Any time my blood pressure started to dip, my nurse would just dial up the IV goods. I never threw up. I’ve always thought my delivery at the hospital with Ruby was really positive and smooth, but Caswell’s birth made it seem mediocre in comparison. I had the A team with Caswell. Same doc same hospital.
It was time to break my water. I’ve never had a doctor break my water before and I was afraid of “feeling it.” So I helped myself to a few more button taps of epidural. She broke my water and I didn’t feel a thing, it was completely fine. Afterwards, she said, “Oh yeah, that baby would never have been able to break your water. It was a bag of steel.”
thank u?????lol? k.
A bit after that, I started to feel a lot of pain, despite my extra epidural taps. I let the nurse know. She encouraged me to keep tapping for epidural and overall wasn’t concerned. In fact, she went out to lunch after that.
A bit later a “lunch break” nurse came in and checked me. My pain had not gotten any better, but I wasn’t too surprised by this. I felt QUITE A BIT OF PRESSURE as well when I delivered Ruby and I assumed this was to be expected.
After the lunch break nurse checked me she was like OH HELLO BABY you’re fully dilated and ready to push. She immediately called my nurse and doc. My doc suspected I had been fully dilated for a while–probably since the intense pain started (maybe about an hour before I started pushing) and likely why I was in so much pain.
So after 15 minutes of pushing, little baby boy was placed on my chest. Except he was not so little, he was a honking 9 lbs 9 oz.
I don’t know this for sure, but I am a doctor, and it seems to me that being fully dilated so long may have contributed to the especially fast delivery? Again, I’m a doctor so this is a fact.
TWO MONTHS LATER
There’s pregnancy and delivery, but then the fourth trimester is the hardest part. The next 18 years are the hardest part.
Quick mommy tangent: It’s insane to me how some moms are going back to work so soon. My maternity leave is 12 weeks, and that is honestly barely enough (very grateful for 12 weeks, that’s pretty good for America). I invite anyone who thinks a maternity leave is a sabbatical to spend the first month with a new mom. Entire days are spent feeding a single baby. The doctor appointments. The calls to after hours nurses. It’s a miracle to even shower, much less leave the house and be somewhere. Omg. that’s all.
It’s insane to me that mothers of newborns are like walking the earth, driving cars, functioning in society. And every one of them are making it look easier than it is!
I was a literally zombie human until about week 7. The exhaustion is crushing.
I’m still getting up every night, but I would say I feel pretty good during the day, I can function far better than the first 7 weeks. And even though I say I “feel pertty good” I catch myself doing questionable things that can only be explained by functioning exhaustion. Like the other day I was pointing to the car seat, telling Ruby, look at Caswell! And yet I was holding Caswell in my arms???
I generally never know what day or time it is (EXCEPT NAP, BED, BATH TIMES). The other night I packed Ruby’s lunch for day car the following day, but she didn’t have day care the following day. The other morning I accidentally got Ruby out of her crib an hour ealier than she normally wakes up.
Lights are on but no one’s home fam!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I either text back immediately because I’m already staring at my phone or not at all because I open it while distracted and forget to respond.
I use voice text now and rarely edit so I don’t even know what my texts say anymore.
I can’t help but compare Cas to Ruby and he continues to be completely different from her in every way:
- DOCTOR APPOINTMENTS. Caswell happily lays down like a pancake on the pediatrician’s table, while Ruby would immediately erupt into screams if a nurse even looked at her–WHILE I HELD HER.
- BATH TIMES. Caswell is generally a pretty happy guy in a bath tub, whereas with Ruby, if you made made one small misstep during bath routine, she would lose it.
- SLEEPING. Caswell is not as good of a sleeper as Ruby was. help. She was sleeping 8 hours by 8 weeks pretty consistently, and I moved her to her room at 8 weeks. Tiny man is 10 weeks and still getting up 1-2x a night to eat plus a few more times on top of that to be given his paci or just reminded that he is the king of the house. I don’t see him moving out of the bedroom bassinet any time soon.
- EATING. I was able to breastfeed Ruby for a whole year, and she actually refused formula when I introduced it around 8-9 months. CAS ON THE OTHER HAND is basically a fully formula-fed baby at 2 months. To sum it up quickly, he would latch fine and it was never painful, but he wouldn’t “efficiently eat” or get enough milk out. He is basically a lazy breastfeeder? Ruby was described as “vigorous” by a lactation consultant lol but this tiny man was like meh. By 6 weeks, my supply had gone down significantly because he wasn’t demanding enough so I started supplementing breastfeeding with formula which turned into supplementing formula with breastfeeding, which turned into just formula lolololol k. It was bizarre–I took supplements, I pumped, I tried everything to keep breastfeeding but he just wants bottles!!! This mans!!!!!!!! It’s as if I had no say in how I would feed him? He said no offense mom but give me the bottle. Let me just say, formula is an entirely different lifestyle than breastfeeding, both have its pros and cons. It will be interesting to compare over the next year.
Caswell makes the funniest noises. Like he already has a sense of humor and is the funniest one in the house. When he’s hungry and crying, he makes this like evil “hu hu heh” chuckle when he finally gets a bottle/boob. When the bottle/boob is taken away, he does this over-the-top dramatic sobs. Always performing.
Both babies are easier and harder in their own ways, but I am obsessed and love every minute of being their mom. Every hard moment is worth it tenfold for the sweet moments.
I had to leave you with a cheesy sentimental moment!!!!
bye dee bye