Three Lies To Tell Yourself Before Getting A Lob

Remember when I was neck-deep in a spiritual warfare about whether or not I should lob my hair? I just used lob as a verb.

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hair inspo help am i bald yet help

Well if you aren’t one of the few, the proud, the Marines, AKA the people who I group text on a regular basis, or follow me on social media, allow me to enlighten you.

Here is the hairy trail of my digital footprint (#wow #thatsentence). Enjoy.

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This tweet is from actual 2014. This site you read this moment wasn’t even alive in August 2014. I didn’t even know myself in August 2014. What is August 2014.

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In 2016, two years later, and I’m STILL waiting on the next trendy betch hairstyle what is that

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ignored cries for help

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I managed to forget about the word lob for over a year, when all of the sudden I’m back and I’m using new Twitter poll features, God help us all

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so you see the problem here

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i still feel this way hi

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be kind

 

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this was the day I cut off 7 inches. I went back another time to cut 5 more.

lob11 does anyone care

does anyone care

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in what world do Lavern and Rhonda tie each other

Screen Shot 2016-03-08 at 9.34.18 PM

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cant wait to have a bob my entire life

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and then there’s my friends

Oh, and I blogged about it here a month or so back. In case my lifetime tweet saga wasn’t enough for you.

So now, to the point of my blog, where I talk about life after lob. #LifeAfterLob #LifeWithLob #LiveLoveLob oksry. Let’s get to the point now.

Three lies to tell yourself before getting a lob

“My boyfriend loves short hair”

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mhm yep.

My boyfriend loves short hair! He’s told me time and time again that he loves my long hair but since my face is staying the exact same, assuming I don’t get really comfortable with him and gain 60 pounds, then he will also love my above-the-shoulder-hair because it’s basically the same thing, it’s all hair. 

“I look great with layers”

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I’m a delicate sunflower blowing in the wind. And I’m a vision in layers. I love layers and layers of me and the more layers in the hair, the more mysterious the woman, as I always say.

But rly, know whether or not u want layers going into the hair appointment ok bye.

“I like to spend time fixing my hair in the morning”

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#CHICLOBS2016

I enjoy waking up earlier than I already do so I can make sure I have time to get confused and frustrated over how to hold and use the hair wand. I’m not satisfied until I burn myself, curse, curse again because I’m not supposed to curse during lent, and run late for work, by which point I’ve given up on the wand and just pulled out the basic ass curling iron. Chic. 

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seriously i cannot with this medieval torture device someone help me

But rly.

I do like my short hair and I’m glad I did it. But like yeah, it was an AdJuStMeNt and identity crisis for a short time period and I didn’t know who I was and I had to search my soul for my purpose in life and question everything I know but like I’m fine I love it.

My first hair tweet, ironically, says I miss my long hair. So I’ve come full circle. God works in mysterious ways. This blog post is very deep and significant to American literature. Thank you for reading. God speed.

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