3 Resolutions You Can Actually Keep

Another year, another vow to lose 10 pounds. Or read more. Or learn something. Doesn’t it get overwhelming, imagining the new you, and all the steps you promised you’d take to get there?

Let’s make a promise to ourselves to do something positive — and set realistic resolutions. Here are my top 3 win-win resolutions that you can actually keep in 2016.

1. Lip Injections

I don’t support Kylie Jenner, but I think we would all be better off by getting the exact same lip injections. I disagree with changing yourself to conform to society’s ridiculous standards, but bigger lips would make your body appear smaller, so it’s like you did lose 10 pounds after all. You get out what you put into it, people. Hard work pays off.

2. A Digital “Re-Tox” 

Many people think green juices are just a fancy, expensive bottles of “sugar water,” and don’t actually cleanse your system. What other natural things are we doing to ourselves that are actually harmful? Being outside? Fresh air? Face-to-face conversations? Yikes.

Spend an hour every day looking at nothing but your phone. This will reboot your system, give you that jolt of energy, and balance your PH levels.

3. Forget “Fashionably Late” — Be “Fashionably Absent”  

Showing up late is a waste of your friends’ time, and showing up at all is a waste of your time. Make sure to sign that RSVP as “attending” because nothing is fashionable if it isn’t full-on unexpected and offensive. FOMO is so 2015. You’re new motto is NOGO.

Happy New Years!

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Filed under faith, humor, wellness

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