I Used To Go On Crash Diets, Now I Just Go On Crash Lifestyle Changes

me, every M/W/F, in the downtown 24 Hour Fitness, every week, all the time, nonstop.

I’m currently in my 6th week of the Kayla Itsines Bikini Body Guide program. Here’s a poem.

Y’all. I’m really doing it. It’s really happening. And it’s a huge FREAKING deal that I’m actually following a something fitness-related that isn’t an Instagram account. And honestly, tbcfh, I’m not even fully following this one. But more on that in a few paragraphs.

I wrote a poem describing my overall experience.

kayla itsines
kayla itsines changed my life
kayla itsines ruined my life
kayla itsines is jesus
kayla itsines is satan
kayla itsines

I don’t have before and after photos. I don’t have tips. I don’t know why you’re here reading this blog post either. But here is another poem about my results so far.

bbg
i’m on week six of bbg
i’ve lost no pounds on bbg
thanks to bbg i can do 15 burpees in a row now
i couldn’t even do 10 in a row week one of bbg
thanks to kanye’s work out plan i’m the envy of all my friends
i used to eat cheese enchiladas and drink margs week 1 of bbg
i eat cheese enchiladas and drink margs week 6 of bbg
im on week six of bbg
bbg

The BBG program also includes a separate ebook for her nutrition guide, which outlines macros, what foods categorize in what groups, how many food groups you should be eating, recipes, and example days. I wrote a poem about this as well.

nope

My friends just started week one of bbg. So i’m not going to say I’m an influencer in the fitness space, but I’m not going to say I’m not. If you are doing this program, I want to e-hug and e-cry with you. Tweet me.